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Hey Rebel Scum,
My name is FC-1032003, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are law-breaking, discord-sowing degenerates who spend every second of their day fighting the Empire. You are everything bad in the galaxy. Honestly, have any of you ever fired an E-11 blaster? I mean, I guess it’s fun smuggling spice through the Kessel Run, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to Hutts on Tatooine.
Don’t be an Ewok. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much military-trained. I was captain of my squad, and ace pilot of my TIE squadron. What qualifications do you have, other than “cannon fodder”? I also have a TIE Interceptor, and have my personal Imperial consort (She just cleaned my armor; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It’s me and my consort